April 18, 2016
Although Samantha seems like your average everyday teen she suffered from self medication by abusing marijuana.
What sent me here was behavior and the use of weed at the same time. When I was using all I thought about was I don’t want to do this. I procrastinated more.
Since her admittance Sam has learned how to cope with her anger and also how to look at her problems differently.
Being in an apartment with girls it drove me insane but it really helped me keep control. It helped me learn how to keep control because I was able to use my coping skills and contain my anger.
She shares how her stay has made her grown by talking to a therapist and working out her problems daily.
One of the girls said I said something that made her upset and she was blowing up and I was just like look at me and talk to me. If we have a problem we can figure this out. She told me today that she appreciates that because she’s never had someone come up to her and help her figure out the problem then it was always behind the back talking. - Samantha
Even before being admitted Samantha was great in academics and that continued to soar even while in rehab. Her dedication to her education is a testament of how hard she's worked and commitment to being the best version of herself.
I’m in three AP courses and all honors classes. I have worked way too hard to get to where I am now. I’m very grateful and I’m so ready to get into college.
Sam's stay here prepared her for life back at home and she is more excited than ever to have a better relationship with her parents.
It’s good practice for when you have to go back into the real world. I’m very grateful and I’m just looking forward to having a great relationship with them(her parents). -Samantha
Listen to Samantha's full story of growth here:
Denise: Hello! So today is your day to go home.
Denise: How does that feel?
Samantha: I’m excited but sad at the same time. It’s a weird emotion.
Denise: Okay tell us about what brought us to Inspirations.
Samantha: Well I had an anger problem and then drugs were a side effect. At least that’s what they told me. I figured what sent me here was behavior and the use of weed at the same time.
Denise: Do you think you self medicated your anger with substance?
Samantha: Definitely I used weed to. All I wanted to do when I was mad was feel happy and weed made me feel nothing. So I thought that was better than anger.
Denise: So did you discover where that anger was coming from?
Samantha: I have an authority problem and I don’t like being told what to do. After being here I kind of worked through that and figured out that its authority and I can’t really do anything about it. So there’s always going to be a person in charge of me.
Denise: So you’ve definitely earned some coping skills when it comes to authority.
Denise: Did you know you were coming here when you came to Inspirations?
Samantha: I had no idea until I was like three hours away.
Samantha: I live five hours away so I got in the car because I thought we were going on a drive then I was like okay we are really far away.
Denise: This is drive is really taking a long time? (laughs)
Samantha: Where are we going? We’re taking you to a place. Then I was lied to about where I was coming. I didn’t figure it out till I actually got here that it was a rehab center.
Denise: I remember that day. I remember you being very upset and very angry which is understandable.
Samantha: And I didn’t have clothes.
Denise: You didn’t have any clothes so you were very angry. So we managed to get the clothes you needed right?
Denise: How long did it take you to kind of settle in and just feel okay?
Samantha: The first week was rough but probably by that first weekend I was feeling better. We got to go to the beach so I felt a lot better because the beach is like home to me, I love it. So probably four or five days until I got situated.
Denise: That’s when you got settled?
Samantha: Yeah, when I got my clothes everything went smoother. (laughs)
Denise: It changed your attitude.
Samantha: Changed my attitude completely when I had more to choose to wear.
Denise: So have you ever been to treatment before? Was this your first time?
Samantha: This was my first time.
Denise: That’s very different huh? It’s kind of scary. It was a lot of emotions you were feeling the first week.
Samantha: It was eye opening too because I didn’t even like know. Some of the like other girls here their drug of choice is so out there that I didn’t even know that this was real that people really did things like this and that this was real life and very eye opening too.
Denise: You’ve heard a lot of stories while you were here.
Samantha: Yes there was not a single girl here that was here besides one when I got here. It’s all new girls.
Denise: So you’ve heard a lot of stories you’ve been to the NA meetings. You’ve realized the dangers of drugs and where it can take you. And you realized the ones you thought would never get caught up in it they did.
Denise: So was this the first time you’ve ever had therapy or did you do therapy before?
Samantha: I’ve never even therapy before so all of this was new.
Denise: How did it seem because I’m sure when you’ve never done therapy before how did it feel?
Samantha: I was like what the hell I’m not a crazy person. I don’t need therapy. (laughs) That was literally my train of thought. Like why do I have to do this? Then I realized you can have a therapist and it’s not bad. Having a therapist is good you’re not crazy because you go to a therapist.
Denise: Do you think everybody should have therapists?
Samantha: Most people I think should have therapists. If you don’t have anyone to talk to that’s a person who you can talk to. It’s a rock, it’s always going to be there.
Denise: It’s someone outside of the family and friends.
Samantha: It’s a non biased opinion.
Denise: You’ve had very high academics. You’ve talked to me about when you came in here and how you’ve had a lot of work to do. You are in how many AP courses?
Samantha: I’m in three AP courses and all honors classes.
Denise: We were like oh geez how is she gonna be able to do all this and keep up with that?
Samantha: Two hours of schoolwork is rough.
Denise: But you managed. You think you managed?
Samantha: Yes, I surprisingly got all of my science work done and I’m sure I’m gonna need a little help for tests and stuff. But, I got almost all my work done and what I don’t I plan to finish on Sunday before I leave.
Denise: It’s amazing what you can do when you’re not using substance right?
Samantha: I got through so much work!
Denise: In an hour you can get through so much work.
Samantha: I finished a whole chapter in like a day.
Denise: Using is very distracting to our brains right?
Denise: We can’t have the focus that you can when clean. Did you notice that?
Samantha: Yeah a lot. When I was using all I thought about was I don’t want to do this. I procrastinated more. I would use and think oh I have all week so let me smoke some now and then do it tomorrow but, then I would smoke the next day and it was a chain of events.
Denise: It kept getting in your way?
Samantha: Yeah. I never got it done.
Denise: I know you were very angry of course when your parents dropped you off. How has that progressed?
Samantha: I actually miss my parents now. When they dropped me off I wanted nothing to do with them and now I can’t wait to see them!
Denise: Aw! I can’t wait to see them! I can’t wait to see them see you. That’s what I look forward to seeing. It’s so beautiful when you see parents with such a difficult choice to make putting your child in treatment. It’s not easy and most people would prefer to keep the problem in the closet right?
Samantha: Yeah that’s kind of how it was I had two separate lives. I had school and church and then drugs. And my home life and it was going downhill fast because of the drugs but my school it was shifting a little but not dramatically. But it was so different and its going to be weird going back.
Denise: So you understand the courage of your parents and how difficult it was to bring you here?
Samantha: Yeah, I was always travelling. So I was wondering how this was any different than being in Europe for a month and a half and they were like because in Europe we get to talk to you every day.
Denise: You’ve really reignited your love for your parents? And now you’re starting a new chapter.
Samantha: I cannot just wait to go home and be with my family.
Denise: Have you done a home contract?
Denise: Talk to us a little about your contract.
Samantha: Some of it I’ve said I have a problem with authority and I’m working through that part of it.
Denise: We are a work in progress our whole lives.
Samantha: Yeah that’s true, some of the things did make me upset but I know how to work through them but a lot of the home contract I filled it out first before my parents even saw it and then we sent it to them with mine already filled out. They only asked to change like two things. They wanted me to add one more person on the no contact list and I agreed with it. I wasn’t expecting this but they told me if I did well I’d be allowed to see her again, I would be allowed to hang out with her it just depends on me. This was the biggest thing they told me they didn’t want me to go to concerts and I’m obsessed with going to concerts.
So we compromised type of thing. I had to agree not to un-chaperoned for the first three months. There’s this big concert in July and they said they’d re-evaluate how I am then and see if I could go. I was really impressed. My curfew isn’t until almost 11:30 on the weekend. I’m coming out of rehab and that’s good. I was just impressed, I put these crazy things on there to see if they’d let me get away with it and they did I was so happy. Then I was like wait can I change this? And she said no she thought it was good.
Denise: That is very commendable because you are owning your plan. It was created by you; they put in the things they thought were important to them. They’ve also allowed you to if you do well things can change. So that was awesome!
Samantha: That was a big thing for me. I didn’t want it to be set in stone.
Denise: They wanna earn trust back.
Samantha: Yeah and I know that’s going to take time.
Denise: It takes years to earn trust sometimes and one minute to screw it up. So that’s what we have to practice so we don’t screw things up.
Samantha: Yeah, literally ten seconds and it’s all gone.
Denise: It’s like school. Look at all the work you’ve done and take something and destroy it.
Samantha: That’s why I was like I have to do my work here I can’t get a month and a half behind. I have worked way too hard to get to where I am now.
Denise: You know what concerts now have sober tents.
Samantha: Yeah, I’ve never gone to a concert high or anything but they are just worried because the music I listen to is very alternative and stoner like is the term that they use.
Denise: And you’ve learned that not being high you can still love that music; you can still dance to the music.
Samantha: Yeah I still love the music with a passion.
Denise: You’ll probably appreciate it more right?
Samantha: Yeah and I know I can have fun without drugs. My friends we’re hilarious with or without using so gonna have fun without using.
Denise: How was it adapting to living in an environment with other girls and dealing with the dynamic? Sometimes I think the dynamic actually helps us grow. Maybe we have a difficult person that comes and it brings up things we need to look at in ourselves. It goes into group and becomes a discussion and sometimes we are learning a lot from other people and their stories.
Samantha: I know being in an apartment with girls it drove me insane but it really helped me keep control. It helped me learn how to keep control because I was able to use my coping skills and contain my anger. I’m sharing a room with a bunch of girls and we don’t always get agree especially us for some reason we love to clash heads but it was really good for me to be able to breathe and separate myself. I had to figure out I can handle this without exploding.
Last night was my last night and one of the girls said I said something that made her upset and she was blowing up and I was just like look at me and talk to me. If we have a problem we can figure this out. She told me today that she appreciates that because she’s never had someone come up to her and help her figure out the problem then it was always behind the back talking. I’ve definitely learned how to deal with drama and anger issues by living with girls.
Denise: You applied coping skills which is excellent!
Samantha: It’s good practice for when you have to go back into the real world.
Denise: It’s a different thing in the real world and now you’ve got these skills. You have a great future ahead of you, a family that has supported you and they had to do a difficult thing which was put you in treatment. It’s very difficult thing to do, you get that right?
Denise: I hope you never have to take your children and put them in treatment but now you respect them and know they did it out of love.
Denise: They want you to grow into a successful person.
Samantha: I’m very grateful and I’m so ready to get into college and have a great relationship with my parents. And whenever I find the right guy I want my relationship to be so strong that my dad can walk me down the aisle. I’m just looking forward to having a great relationship with them.
Denise: Okay you’re making me emotional; it’s so beautiful to see you speak like that and too see your face it’s shining. So keep on shining, we love you, you were an awesome part of our program and you did a phenomenal job even with other girls. You really were a leader and that’s important. Thank you so much and have a safe trip and keep in touch because we’d love to hear how you’re doing after you leave. You become our family and you go out the door and we really miss you. We’d love to hear back on how you’re doing.
Samantha: I’ll send you pictures from my mission trips.
Denise: Yay! I love the mission trips and I always ask for graduation pictures.
Samantha: Ah! I can’t wait to graduate!
Denise: I want your graduation pictures and I want to hear how you do on those AP exams. Those are very difficult and I’m curious to see how you do.
Samantha: Yeah, one month left.
Denise: You have to work hard this month but you can do it because you’re clear minded.
Samantha: I’m prepared. I can do this!
Denise: Awesome! Well thank you so much for sharing it’s very important that other people hear what the experience is like to be in treatment. Thank You! Have a good trip!
Samantha: Ah! I’m so excited!